Do Opposites Attract? Why or Why not?

October 27, 2014

Do opposites attract, the question that many people are actually 50/50 about in their answers!  Some people define opposites as polar differences and complete yin and yang scenarios, yet others think that opposites mean one person has the other person's weakness and vice versa, creating balance.  Here are some tips on how opposites can and cannot be good for a relationship.

 

CAN:

Having things in common

Even though you are very different people, say one person likes sports and the other person likes concerts, you can work by appreciating and learning about the other person's likes and create things you like in common.  Maybe one person loves pizza and the other person loves health food, this is where you can make a healthy pizza together and create something you have in common.  Learning to blend your interests and both enjoy them can make a great relationship more interesting!

 

CAN'T:

On different emotional levels

One person is needy, sad, clingy, desperate and jealous while the other person is confident, independent, strong, happy and self sufficient.  This emotional imbalance can cause some major chaos where one person is always dragging down the other person regardless of how good the relationship is.  One person is on the opposite spectrum of the other person and there is no balance in the give and take in the relationship.  One person is giving it all and the other person is taking it all.  Not healthy.

 

CAN:

Leveling out the other person

One person is an artisty type and the other person is all business and together they make a balanced team that can handle diversity by one person bringing out the creative side in the other, and the more serious type bringing out the responsibility in their partner.  Or, one person is adventurous and the other is a stay-at-home kinda lover.  This is where the adventurer can bring the homebody out of their shell and show them some fun and confidence in going to new places, and the homebody can mellow out the explorer by teaching them ways to have quiet moments and doing things for the home.

 

CAN'T:

Bored and annoyed

Once the honeymoon stage of attraction falls away you are left with conversation and interests in which can become boring and annoying if you hate everything the other person likes or doesn't like.  For example if one of you is obsessed with video games and cannot compromise or do anything outside of 'Zelda' while the other person is obsessed with nature and can't ever be inside and hates anything electronic, the chemistry will fade and you will grow a part.  Unless you find something else you have in common that is cementing in your relationship it is hard to overcome such huge differences.  Certain personality types shouldn't try to change or be someone they are not.  It never works because you are who you are and the other person should love those things about you and respect them. 

 

CAN:

Team effort

Say one of you is an amazing cook but the other person is great at cleaning up, there are great jobs for each person in the relationship that don't compete with each other which may be better!  If you were both really into cooking and always fought about who gets to make dinner because both of you hate cleaning, you may always have a dirty kitchen and feel like you aren't able to do something you love.  Another example is if one person is a great packer and organizer and the other person is really good at ideas and making the trip fun.  This is where you can be a team and have a great road trip!  If you both were fighting over who organizes and packs because you both think you are better at it, but no one is fun on trips and has any idea on where to go...this could make for a horrible outcome.  Team effort creates unity, respect for each others strengths and minimal competition, which means less fights!

 

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